—Richard Siken, from “I Had a Dream About You,” Crush
MARK! MARK! hes wired in. sorry? he’s wired in. is he? yes. [smashes computer] HOW BOUT NOW YOU STILL WIRED IN? you issued 24 M i l l i o n new shares of stock? you were told if new investors came along— How much were your shares diluted? HOW MUCH WERE HIS? you signed the papers. y o u s e t m e u p … you’re gonna blame me because you’re the business head of the company and you made a bad business deal with your o w n company? this is gonna be like im Not A Part Of Facebook. it won’t be like you’re not a part of facebook. you’re not a part of facebook. my name’s on the masthead. you might wanna check again. IS THIS BECAUSE I FROZE THE ACCOUNT? if you think we were gonna let you parade around in your ridiculous suits pretending you were running this company—S O R R Y MY PRADA’S AT THE CLEANERS ALONG WITH HOODIE AND MY FUCK-YOU FLIP FLOPS, YOU PRETENTIOUS DOUCHEBAG. security’s here, you’ll be leaving now. I’m not signing those papers. we will get the signature. tell me this isn’t about me getting into the phoenix…y-you did iT I KNEW YOU DID IT YOU PLANTED THAT STORY ABOUT THE C H I C K E N [i didn’t plant the story about the chicken] (what is he talking about?) YOU HAD ME ACCUSED OF ANIMAL CRUELTY (seriously what the hell’s the chicken) and I’ll bet what you hated the most is that they identified me as the Co - Founder Of Facebook. W h i c h . I . A m . You Better Lawyer Up, Asshole. Because I’m Not Coming Back For 30%. I ’ m C o m i n g B a c k F o r E V E R Y T H I N G .
life giver
gay power !
hollywood: it’s time to make another lesbian movie can someone please bring out the wheel of white women….. we’re gonna have *spins* saoirse ronan and *spins* kate winslet in a period piece film! this is perfect because there’s a huge age gap too
y’all:
everything’s connected
like elijah daniel is annoying but kj’s response is hilarious
sherlock holmes
watson: what is it holmes
holmes: *touches the corpse and puts his finger in his mouth* this man is dead
watson: i wish you loved me
holmes: what was that? i was just telling detective inspector lestrade a thinly veiled metaphor for how you are my one great romance, the likes of which will never be witnessed again, and i am irreparably changed for having met you despite knowing now you could never love me back
watson: nothing
holmes: oh ok *goes back to licking the crime scene*
why must a soup be ‘special’… is it not enough to have something warm and hearty in the dead of winter
skam bloopers; season 3
v*ltron: literally killed off the black main character for ‘shock value’ and left their other brown character to be sad in the end for the rest of his life and haven’t treated any of their minority representing characters correctly since the show started and the whole plot line and writing of the show is just flat out fucking racist/homophobic/xenophobic
some of y’all: wah they gave us allurance scenes >:( they didn’t make klance canon :((( how could they :((( oh well this doesn’t personally affect me bc i have no concept of my own privilege but thanks for the show anyway i love it <3
Fat Thigh Energy
discussing history w men is just like
